How to do sympathetic vampire characters (which, incidentally you shouldn't do. Vampires are disgusting.)

Here's a little extract from Terry Pratchett's The Truth - this is possibly the only moment in literary history in which you will find me rooting for any kind of vampire. Don't read this if you ever intend to read The Truth, because it's sort of the climax of the entire book... and here's a brief synopsis of the story so that this scene makes sense: William de Worde is a journalist who has just discovered that his father, Lord de Worde, is behind the conspiracy to depose Lord Vetinari, patrician of Ank-Morpork. Lord de Worde has been repeatedly shown to be prejudiced against anything different to him - dwarfs, vampires, whatever. Otto is the newspaper's photographer - and a vampire who has taken the 'black ribbon' oath of not doing vampire-y things.

'Overhead, a shrouded chandelier jingled gently.
William looked up. "Oh, no," he said. "Please... don't kill anyone!"
"What?" said Lord de Worde.
Otto Chriek dropped to the floor, hands raised like talons.
"Good evening!" he said to a shocked bailiff. He looked at his hands. "Oh, vot am I thinking off!" He bunched up his fists and danced from foot to foot. "Put zem up in the traditional Ank-Morpork pugilism!"
"Put them up?" said the man, raising a cudgel. "Blow that!"
A jab from Otto lifted him off his feet. He landed on his back and slid away across the polished floor. Otto spun round so fast that he blurred, and there was a smack as another man went down.
"Vot's this? Vot's this? I'm using your civilised fisticuffs and you don't vant to fight?" he said, springing back and forth like an amateur boxer. "Ah, you, sir, you show fight -" The fists blurred into invisibility and pummelled a man like a punchbag. Otto straightened up as the man fell, and absent-mindedly punched sideways to catch the charging fourth man on the chin. The man actually spun in the air.
This happened in a few seconds. And then William got enough of a grip to shout a warning. He was too late.
Otto looked down at the length of sword blade sticking too far into his chest.
"Oh, vill you look at zis," he said. "You know, in zis job I cannot make a shirt last two days?"
He turned to Lord de Worde, who was backing away, and cracked his knuckles.
"Keep it away from me!" shouted his lordship.
William shook his head.
"Oh yes?" said Otto, still advancing. "You think I am an it? Vell, let me act like an it."
He grabbed Lord de Worde's jacket and held him up in the air, with one hand, at arm's length.
"Ve have people like you back home," he said. "Zey are the vuns that tell the mob vot to do. I come here to Ank-Morpork, zey tell me things are different, but really it is alvays the same. Alvays zere are damn people like you! And now, vot shall I do viz you?"
He wrenched at his own jacket and tossed the black ribbon aside.
"I never liked zer damn cocoa anyvay," he said.
"Otto!"
The vampire turned. "Yes, Villiam? Vot is it you vish?"
"That's going too far." Lord de Worde had gone pale. William had never seen him so obviously frightened before.
"Oh? You say? You think I bite him? Shall I bite you, Mister Lordship? Vell, maybe not, because Villiam here thinks I am a good person." He pulled Lord de Worde close, so that their faces were a few inches apart. "Now, maybe I have to ask myself, how good am I? Or maybe I just have to ask myself... am I better zan you?" He hesitated for a second or two and then in a sudden movement jerked the man towards him.
With great delicacy he planted a kiss on Lord de Worde's forehead. Then he put the trembling man back down on the floor and patted him on the head.
"Actually, maybe zer cocoa is not too bad and zer young lady who plays zer harmonium, sometimes she vinks at me," he said, stepping aside.'


And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how it's done.